LIBIDO

Thinking about my mom … of her life.
Thinking of our gender, to be a woman of all different ages.
Thinking of the body as an object, as subject, as mass media
image, as a projection of the fantasies and prejudices.
Thinking of my body, which is the mass harbouring me,
my self, as the instrument I use for reflection and
interaction with other people.
Thinking of it has been with me from the beginning and that this
body will be with me until the end.
Thinking of the contexts, and social
structures that make up the normative breaks I like
woman, in this body, has to relate to.
Thinking about the price, the cost to conform to the
regulations that apply.
Thinking of what it costs not to be inserted, sometimes
uncomfortable lurch me in the role I unasked been assigned.
Thinking of the global patriarchal gender power relations,
and its vile oppression expressed in physical, economic
and political terms. Here and now, HERE AND NOW!
Thinking about the oppression and violence women and children are exposed to,
physically and mentally.
Thinking that it could be different.
Thinking that it should be different.
Thinking that I can finally love my body and all
its content.
Thinking that I wish I could do that when
I was younger.
Thinking that I can now allow my body to be scene
for my jewelry with joy and pride.
Thinking of what is normal.
Thinking that it is possible to widen the field, to extend
over the edge.
Thinking that my jewellery moving against my skin is sensual.
Thinking that my jewelry to my skin
can be painful.
Thinking that they can be just as love.
Thinking that they can be an expression of my strength, my love,
my aggressiveness, my sexuality, my weaknesses,
my courage and my fears.
Thinking of female sexuality, my sexuality,
what it was, what it is and what it can become.
Thinking of women deprived of their sexuality with a knife.
Thinking about that the same mechanisms that curtail
women’s lives in all contexts.
Thinking of what female sexuality may be, and not
may be, in my social context.
Thinking of it may contain outward behavior, exhibitionism,
physical strength, mental strength.
Thinking of my child, my son.
Thinking that he was also assigned a role.
Thinking that he and all the other sons are also losers in
the existing pattern.
Thinking that I would give him more opportunities
to shape his life, his role.
Thinking that I will think of all this
the rest of my life.